Playing by the Rules
by RookieBlue007
Summary: Chris has always played by the rules. In his mind the good guys should always come out on top. But what happens when playing by the rules could cost him everything?
1. Rules

Playing by the Rules

**A/N: I've always been intrigued by the character of Chris. He comes off as so put together and polished but we know that behind it all is a tumultuous past. I remember the writers saying that this season he evolves a bit and I can't wait to see what triggers it. I think we saw a glimpse of the new Chris when he lied to the phone company and used Jerry's name to get the phone records in 301. The look that Sam and Jerry exchanged was like "whaattt? Did Diaz just do that?". Anyways, this might be a one shot or a story. I haven't fully mapped it out yet.**

Follow the rules. Do what's right. Because if you don't there will be consequences. This is a lesson that Chris Diaz learned well. He probably learned it before he learned to walk. You wake up at night, you stay in your crib crying till you fall back asleep. You don't eat your pureed yams you sit there in your highchair until you do. As he got older the punishments became more severe. All reinforcing the same concept. He hoped and prayed for a way out. Maybe dad his would come back and everything will be alright. But that never happened.

Eventually, he resigned himself to simply do as told. Don't question authority. Follow the rules. And a lot of times it did make life easier. He was well liked, trustworthy, and noble. Became the town hero when he led them to the football championships. Had a beautiful girlfriend who adored him and admired his loyalty. Got good enough grades to get a college scholarship if he wanted. Then he moved to the city to be a a cop, to help people, and everything turned to hell.

It's the big city he reasoned. It uses and abuses you then spits you out for the wolves to eat. People in the city are cruel. They don't value the rules. Don't see how much easier it would be if they could all just be genuine and actually give a damn. Instead, everyone runs around trying to find a way to one up the rest. "I'll show them" he thought. "I'll be the good guy, I'll follow the rules, and I'll be the best cop this city has ever seen. I'll prove to everyone that the good guys can come up on top"

That was his resolve. Well, at least until he fell for Gail. She brought out another side of him. Made him a little edgy. Made him relinquish control and live in the moment. He liked it while it lasted. And when it ended it was like a kick in the gut. Not because he lost the girl he loved but because once again it was proof that the good guys don't come out on top.

"It's my fault" he reasoned. Decided to turn a new leaf. To start volunteering with the church group he'd sent the bullied kid to. Figured running into the priest was a sign from God telling him he'd started to stray again and that it was time to shape up. It helped. He was happy. He got his life back on track. Got everything he'd ever wanted. Until now.

Now, Chris Diaz had to make a choice. Keep living by the rules. Keep being the good guy—the good cop and risk losing it all. Or bend the rules and save the life he worked so hard to put together.


	2. Happenstance

**Happenstance**

Walking up the stairs to the apartment it just doesn't feel right to go inside. He stands for a moment with his hand on the cold brass handle before pushing the door open and stepping into the darkness. He walks to the kitchen without turning on any of the lights—he doesn't have to, he has every inch of the place memorized. Fumbling through the cabinets as the moonlight streams through the open window he finally finds the scotch and pours himself a glass before heading towards the couch. It only takes a couple of sips for him to empty it out. He coddles the empty glass in his hands. It takes every once of self control he has left not hurl it across the empty room. Instead he tosses it lightly onto the coffee table and leans his head back into the cool leather of the couch.

It's been a while since he's sat in a dark, empty, room alone. It reminds him of the times his mother would force him to sit and read the dictionary for hours with just a small reading lamp on. If he ever opened his mouth to speak back to her this would be her punishment of choice. She'd tell him words weren't meant to be used to speak back and to sit and read until he learned how they should be used. On the bright side, it helped him score high on the SATs and he could always stump his friends with his vast vocabulary.

He wonders if there is a word for everything going up in flames. Or maybe there's one blaming your friends for not doing enough and alienating everyone that cares about you when you need them the most. And there has got to be a word for wanting to put the life of an innocent person in danger so you don't lose yours. Apostasy. Apostasy of principles, that's gotta be it.

Taking a deep breath he sinks deeper into the couch. Closing his eyes he tries desperately to figure out where it all went wrong. To find a sliver of himself left.

_He'd been volunteering every morning with the reverend passing out meals for the past couple of weeks and had finally started to see the good in people again. Seeing others wake up early and brave the cold to help the less fortunate shed the city in a new light. Night shift rotations were starting so he figured he'd catch the dinner crowd instead. He never imagined to hear her voice while passing out boxes of sandwiches._

_"Chris?" her tone was full of doubt but he'd recognize that voice anywhere._  
_"Denise?", her hair was shorter but there was no mistaking it was her._

_She let out a small laugh at the look of confusion plastered on his face. The way that smile went up to her eyes..oh God how he had missed seeing that._

_"Uhh..How are you? What are you doing here?" he let out awkwardly as the line in front of him continued to move, demanding his attention._

_"Dropping off a couple boxes of cupcakes" he finally noticed that she was carrying something, "I usually try to drop some off every dinner rotaition so the kids can enjoy a dessert"._

_"I mean, what are you doing in the city?" He was pretty sure she knew that's what he really meant and was almost afraid to hear the answer to his question. Wouldn't be surprised if she got married and moved out here._

_"That..." she took a cupcake out of her box handing it to a young boy clinging to his mother for dear life, "is a long story. Come out for coffee with me after this and I'll tell you" flashing him one of her signature-light-up-the-room-and-desolve-any-resolve-he-has smiles._

_"I have to head for my shift in an hour" his response was nervous. He hoped she wouldn't think he was making up excuses._

_"What time do you have lunch break? I'll stop by"_

Of all the things he thought might happen Denise coming back into his life hadn't been one of them. And now, he couldn't begin to imagine what I life without her might entail.

**A/N: Still working on the details of the story but I have an idea where it's going. Would love to hear feedback! **


End file.
